Reminder to myself

Im going to go back and rewrite my old dreams - they are a nightmare to read! Starting with the oldest to the latest. Maybe ill turn them into a story or something i dunno. Bleh.

Fight to the death and a card game

i can't really remember what happened exactly - i probably could if i tried but it was a nightmare so i don't really want to. Ill remember whatever i need to to just keep it in context but it aint that great.

so what happened was this - i was at my old primary school - lol but anyway, i was with this lady and i knew her well apparently. she had curly-ish blonde hair and she was all hippy looking - she was wearing a beautiful skirt, a white top and she looked about in her 40s. She was looking terrified, so terrified that she couldn't even think straight, she was just sitting there, frozen and i was trying to convince her to run. Thats when my boss turned up. My boss had really white skin, black hair and black eyes, actually on looking back she looked a bit like joan jett. She was wearing this really black flowy gown that trailed behind her, i i don't remember why but i was terrified of her. But I'm happy with myself in this dream since i was exactly like myself in real life - i was scared of her but if anything happened i wasn't afraid to fight fucking back. So she was looking for this lady and i knew it, so i stepped in front of the lady to hide her from my boss's view. My boss asked me where the lady was, and told me to find her or i was in trouble (its funny though because when we talked to each other no words were spoken, i don't even remember her mouth moving, its like we just talked through sensing each others feelings - no actual words were formed even in my head at all). I told her id find her so don't worry (my boss never noticed her behind me - i know she assumed it was one of my young mates). So she left and i started trying to get the lady to move again and i finally got her to get up and start running across the tennis court towards the playgrounds - but we skipped past the playground and for some reason the set of stairs down to the field was right next to it - and we headed for it. We were half way down when i looked back from where we just were - and i saw my boss and her soldiers coming round the corner, and i knew we were pretty much dead. That is when death turned up - i knew i was the only one who could see him and for some reason i knew him well. He was in his robe, and i couldn't see his face, i don't remember if he was a skeleton or not and he was holding his (weapon) and he told me it was time for the lady who i was trying to help get away to die. And i looked at him and told him to fuck off. No one was going to die here tonight. And he tilted his head at me - i knew that he had cuz i saw his hood tilt slightly and he was like she has to die tonight and you know that, and i cant stop it no matter what i do. But i yelled at him to FUCK OFF and I'm not letting ANYONE die tonight and i will fight him as much as it takes to make sure she doest die! And i knew that he just looked at me pitifully and shook his head, and i felt a bit scared since i had a crush on death and i didn't want him to hate me for yelling at him lol. Then he disappeared and i yelled at the lady to go cause i knew the soldiers were tracking her scent and would be here in a sec (they all were still at the place where we just left so the thing with Death must have all happened in a second). She left and i ran back because i could see our soldiers were running from the playground into the tennis courts, and they were going to fight soon so i had to make sure my niece and nephew weren't in the tennis court. I ran to the front of our soldiers getting ready to fight and i found them, and yelled at them to get to the playgrounds, i grabbed their hands and pulled them along as i ran towards the playground, but then i realised i knew our soldiers were amateurs and my boss's were skilled and so i had to help them and i knew since i was a skilled archer (lol in my dreams) the best place for me to be to help our soldiers would be to get to the highest point in the playground and attack from there, but i wanted to give the soliders encouragement and i didn't want them to think they were alone - i wanted them to know where i was so let go of my nieces and nephews hands and told them to run into the playground and hide and ill be there as soon as possible. So i ran back to the soliders to tell them but thats when my boss's soldiers started attacking. They were goblins, ogres and sprites, all green and grey flesh and they were huge as they ran to us, i had a split second though to decide to stay - i thought even though id be better help being a archer i can't run now or my soldiers will think I'm a coward - and they would prob run too so i got my sword out and ran towards them to fight and clashed into the goblins, etc. It took me three huge slashes to take down one, and when i looked around i saw that it took longer for my soldiers to fight back since they weren't as skilled as me, and it only took the goblins, etc one slash to take down one of my soldiers. My soldiers were getting killed left right and centre and i thought "shit!!" cause i knew we were getting slaughtered. I thought i knew i should have fell back to fight as a archer and this was the wrong decision and thats when i realised it was too late now, there were only three of us left and as i looked around i saw my soldiers get taken down, then i looked in front of me and saw a ogre come towards me holding his sword up ready to swipe and i thought well at least i died fighting!!! And also that i was going to meet death in a mo. and thats it. there is more and i could probably remember it if i tried but i don't want to.



i remember the first time i dreamt that i died, i can't really remember the dream entirely since i prob dreamt it when i was six, but basically there was this clown rag doll, and it was bigger and taller than me. I think my aunty had one at her house and that was what i was dreaming. I wasn't afraid of clowns or anything, its just this clown had a crush on me, and i told him i didn't like him so he stalked me and killed me and i just remember this intense fear of being afraid of the clown since i didn't know i was dreaming and i didn't want to die. But after i died My dream suddenly turned black and white and i could see myself murdered in the clowns arms. And yeah, the dream went on from there in black and white. really weird lol



but i had this day dream before i went to sleep last night. I don't know if thats the right thing to call it but i don't know any better phrase, since i was dreaming but i wasn't asleep, i was just letting my imagination run wild, but at the same time i was falling asleep and i actually have no conrol over my imagination, about what i want to dream about, so its not really like day dreaming. Any way the dream was that i was playing cards with my mum, we were playing snap and i could see the cards in my hands were like the cards in alice in wonderland - they had heads, arms and legs and were holding spears and they looked up at me as we played. Any way, i went to go put a card down, but suddenly my arm and my hand was a skeleton and the card i put down was a tarot card, it depicted death in his robe with his sheath, and he was holding out his hand and cutting it off with his other. The sky was grey and he stood on green grass, there was a white lamb next to him on the ground and a rose hanging upside down above him with the sun on the top left side of the card, only half showing and the other side was a waning or waxing moon, meh the only part showing was the left side of the moon, the rest was dark and that was in the top right corner. Then my mum who was suddenly not my mum anymore but a skeleton grinning at me in a purple top hat and red bow tie and purple suit with a red shirt, put down another tart card and it had on it a demon, smiling up at me while crouching on the world, facing towards me, the whole card was blue while the demon and world and stars were outlined in black and the demon turned red then laughed at me and jumped up at me. But as it jumped towards me it turned int a spider and then into a fish with razor sharp teeth. But it just swam sideways into the back of my mind while other creepy things swam behind it and i must've fell asleep then cause i can't remember after that.